Updating Your Estate Plan After a Divorce or Remarriage

Why updating matters

Divorce and remarriage change legal relationships, financial responsibilities, and family dynamics. If your estate documents still reflect an old status—naming an ex-spouse, naming a prior spouse as agent under a power of attorney, or leaving assets in joint title—those documents can produce outcomes that conflict with your current intentions. In my practice as a financial planner working with clients through these transitions, I regularly see small oversights (like an unchanged life-insurance beneficiary) produce major headaches for survivors.

Federal rules and state laws interact here: beneficiary designations on retirement plans and life insurance usually control who receives those assets regardless of your will (see IRS guidance), while some state laws will automatically revoke will provisions that favor an ex-spouse after divorce. Because rules vary by state and by asset type, a methodical review is essential. For general legal and tax guidance, consult the IRS (https://www.irs.gov) and the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (https://www.consumerfinance.gov).

Quick checklist: what to update first

1. Beneficiary designations (life insurance, 401(k)/IRA, annuities, pensions)
2. Will and any living trusts
3. Powers of attorney (financial and healthcare) and HIPAA authorizations
4. Deeds and property titles (joint tenancy, tenants by the entirety)
5. Payable-on-death (POD) and transfer-on-death (TOD) account registrations
6. Business succession documents and buy-sell agreements
7. Letters of instruction and digital asset access
8. Estate-tax planning documents (if applicable), prenup/postnup language

Complete these updates promptly. I advise clients to prioritize beneficiary changes and POA/healthcare directives within days to weeks of a finalized divorce or marriage.

Step-by-step process

1. Gather documents and list assets

• Pull your will, trusts, powers of attorney, health-care directive, life insurance policies, retirement account statements, brokerage statements, mortgage deed, business agreements, and beneficiary change forms.
• Create a simple inventory spreadsheet with account numbers, current beneficiaries, and where each asset is titled.

1. Update beneficiaries and account registrations first

• Beneficiary designations on employer retirement plans, IRAs, life insurance, annuities, and some brokerage accounts pass outside a will and must be changed directly with the plan insurer or administrator.
• Note: Naming a beneficiary like a spouse on a plan usually overrides a contrary will. Check plan rules for spousal consent requirements if you are married. For technical and tax details, see IRS resources on retirement plan distributions (https://www.irs.gov).

1. Review and revise your will and trusts

• Divorce may automatically revoke certain provisions depending on state law; however, that doesn’t always extend to trusts or beneficiary designations. Rewriting a will or issuing a codicil with clear language avoids ambiguity.
• If you have a living trust, confirm successor trustees and distribution terms. Consider a marital or QTIP trust if you have a blended family and want to provide for a spouse while protecting children from a prior marriage.

1. Replace or re-execute powers of attorney and health-care proxies

• Powers of attorney typically terminate on divorce if the named agent is a former spouse, but state law varies. Even when not automatically revoked, an ex-spouse named as your agent can be inappropriate—execute new documents naming trusted individuals.
• Re-authorize HIPAA releases to permit the right people to get medical information.

1. Retitle property and update deeds

• Real property held as joint tenants or tenants by the entirety may pass automatically to a surviving joint owner. If you divorced and did not retitle, joint ownership can give an ex-spouse access to property you intend to exclude.
• Work with your attorney or title company to change deeds where needed.

1. Revisit life insurance and business agreements

• If you’re a business owner, update buy-sell agreements or key-person insurance beneficiaries.
• Confirm who will receive policy proceeds; consider an irrevocable life insurance trust (ILIT) if you want proceeds outside of your estate.

1. Address blended-family specifics

• Use trusts to balance spousal support with children’s inheritance from prior relationships.
• Name separate beneficiary classes (e.g., specific bequests to children, remainder to spouse) and clearly define terms for stepchildren.
• For detailed guidance on blended-family strategies, see our piece on estate planning for blended families.

1. Update digital accounts, passwords, and instructions

• Document login locations and give trusted individuals access via a password manager or written instructions stored safely.
• See related guidance on handling online accounts in estate planning in our article on digital assets and online accounts.

1. Reassess tax and estate-planning strategies

• Major remarriage can change your estate-tax planning approach. Federal estate and gift tax rules, exemptions, and portability of a deceased spouse’s unused exclusion can affect long-term planning; check current IRS guidance for up-to-date thresholds and consult a tax or estate attorney for personalized strategies.

Common pitfalls I see (and how to avoid them)

• Leaving beneficiary designations unchanged: A will doesn’t control retirement accounts or life insurance—update each account directly.
• Assuming divorce revokes all prior documents: State statutes differ. Don’t rely on assumption—make explicit revisions.
• Failing to retitle jointly held assets: Joint accounts and property may pass automatically to the co-owner.
• Ignoring stepchildren or blended-family equity: Design trusts with clear instructions to avoid disputes.
• Not coordinating estate and tax planning: Remarriage may increase estate-tax exposure or change the best vehicle (trust types) for your goals.

Example scenarios and sample language

• Removing an ex as beneficiary (sample instruction to plan administrator):

  “I hereby revoke any prior beneficiary designation dated [date] naming [ex-spouse name] and designate [new beneficiary name(s) and SSN or account if required] as primary beneficiary(ies) for policy/account number [#].”

• Will clause for blended family (illustrative, not legal advice):

  “I leave [percentage or asset] in trust for my surviving spouse for life for health, education, maintenance, and support, with the remainder to be distributed to my children named [names] upon the spouse’s death.”

Always have an attorney review and adapt language to your state law and family circumstances.

Timing and cost considerations

• Timing: Change beneficiary designations and powers of attorney immediately after finalizing a divorce or after marriage. Update wills and trusts as soon as reasonably possible.
• Cost: Fees vary by attorney and complexity. A simple beneficiary update can be free or low cost; redoing a will or trust typically ranges from several hundred to several thousand dollars depending on complexity and attorney rates.

How I work with clients

In practice, I start with a document and asset inventory, then prioritize beneficiary changes and POA/healthcare directives. I coordinate with an estate-planning attorney to draft or revise wills/trusts and with tax advisors when estate-tax planning might be relevant. Clear communication with family members is a priority to reduce conflict after the changes are made.

Where to get authoritative help

• IRS (tax and retirement-plan distribution guidance): https://www.irs.gov
• Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (consumer-facing resources on wills, POAs, and beneficiary designations): https://www.consumerfinance.gov

Also consider an estate-planning attorney licensed in your state and a Certified Financial Planner® or tax advisor for coordination.

Professional disclaimer

This article is educational and general in nature and does not constitute legal, tax, or financial advice. State laws differ and tax rules change; speak with a qualified estate-planning attorney and tax advisor before making binding changes.

Further reading on our site:

• When to update your plan after life changes: When to Update Your Estate Plan: A Post-Event Checklist
• Strategies for blended families: Estate Planning for Blended Families